Choosing how we engage with AI without letting the pressure to keep up decide for us
“Will AI replace coaches?”
This question has come up repeatedly in my conversations with colleagues and coaches I work with.
Alongside it, I hear others: "Should I be using AI more?" "Am I falling behind?" "Does the work I have invested in developing myself still matter?"
These concerns deserve space, especially when they touch our livelihood and a profession we care about. Yet I notice how much of the messaging around artificial intelligence invites us to act from precisely that place of fear:
Adopt this AI tool. Learn this approach. Change your business – or risk becoming irrelevant.
When I encounter these messages, I recognise the sensation they create in me, and I choose to ask myself: "Where is the place I want to respond from?"
Because fear can move us in more than one direction.
We might resist exploring AI because we feel threatened by it. Or we might rush to incorporate it because we're afraid of being left behind. Either way, we may find ourselves reacting before we have considered how we actually want to engage.
I would like to make room for curiosity.
Beginning with what matters to us as coaches
Recently, I have been offering webinars on coaching in the age of AI. In these sessions, I often invite a shift in the discussion so that we begin by examining what matters most to us:
"What value do I want to create as a coach?" "What matters to me about this work?" "What do I want people to experience in our partnership?" "What am I committed to cultivating in myself so that I can offer that more fully?"
These questions offer a starting point for exploring our relationship with AI. From there, we can consider where AI might support our work, where it might free up time, and where we want to remain directly involved in the process.
Curiosity lets us investigate without needing immediate answers about whether we are enthusiastic adopters or reluctant observers. We can try something, question what comes back, discover that it is useful for one purpose and less useful for another, and revise our choices as we learn.
We can also ask whether we are using AI because it serves an intention we have chosen, or just because we feel we should.
As the webinar conversations developed, another important question surfaced:
What happens when AI becomes our first and only response?
Sometimes AI is useful. I appreciate the support with certain tasks and having easier access to information.
But what happens when “I don’t know” is immediately followed by “I’ll ask AI”?
Where do we practice finding our own way? Where do we give ourselves room to research, imagine, follow an unexpected connection or discover something through an attempt that doesn't immediately work?
I recognise in my own experience that creativity often needs space.
Sometimes an idea arrives while I am exploring. Sometimes it takes a little longer, and I need to push through the discomfort of not yet knowing what I want to say or do.
If I move immediately towards an available answer, I may miss that experience.
This connects so closely with what I value about coaching. When I first experienced being coached, something significant happened: I felt that my own perspective was worth listening to. I discovered that I could find a way forward, with another person alongside me who trusted my capacity to do so.
That experience gave me evidence of my own resourcefulness.
I want to keep paying attention to how I build that evidence.
When I use AI, am I creating more room for my thinking? Or am I repeatedly stepping away from the opportunity to discover what I can do?
Bringing curiosity to our coaching in the age of AI
We can bring the same inquiry into the coaching room.
When a client says, “I don’t know,” what happens within us?
Do we feel pressure to produce a question, suggest a direction, or make something happen?
How much room do we allow the client to continue discovering what they think?
Our relationship with uncertainty matters here. If we can notice our own impulse to quickly move towards an answer, we can choose how we respond.
We might allow more time, offer an observation, or ask the client how they would like to explore.
Whether we're deciding how to use AI or how to respond to a client, mastery asks us to bring our awareness to what is directing us. It asks us to participate consciously.
A small experiment in curiosity and choice
The next time you are about to turn to AI, I invite you to pause long enough to consider three questions:
- What am I hoping AI will make possible?
- Which part of this process would I like to explore myself?
- How will I assess what comes back?
You might write down your first thoughts before opening the tool, or decide which part of a task you want support with.
Afterwards, notice what you contributed, what AI contributed and what you learned through the combination.
There is no prescribed balance to achieve. The invitation is to become more conscious of the choices available to you.
Fear may still be present. So may enthusiasm, uncertainty and the pressure to keep up.
We can notice all of them while returning to what matters to us and choosing how we want to engage.
What would you become curious about if you allowed yourself to choose your own relationship with AI?
Interested in joining discussions about mastery and the role of AI in coaching?
You can access my free resource:
Future-Proofing Your Coaching Career in the Age of AI
I also host regular free events with established coaches and run group Level 3 Mastery in Coaching cohorts, where you can prepare for MCC or develop your skills in a supportive environment.
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